Welp, he thought, he'd fucked up two relationships within hours of each other. Things weren't great at hime, but he had faith he could get Fawn to come round.
Fin was another story.
John sent flowers to his hotel with a simple note that said sorry I'm an asshole. Once he got the notification it had been delivered, he waited a bit, then texted Fin.
Can I see you?
Fin was another story.
John sent flowers to his hotel with a simple note that said sorry I'm an asshole. Once he got the notification it had been delivered, he waited a bit, then texted Fin.
Can I see you?
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Date: 2021-06-03 01:30 am (UTC)He didn't reply right away, but eventually he texted back.
you're an asshole
I should tell you to fuck off
He lowered the phone, then sighed.
Fine. Mirror's open.
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Date: 2021-06-03 01:36 am (UTC)Nearly a half hour later, John stepped through. He looked more haggard than he usually did. His hair stuck up and there was a bit of blood on his collar that he just couldn't get out.
"Hi," he said quietly and stayed where he was. "I am an asshole. You're not wrong. But I'm sorry. I shouldn't have."
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Date: 2021-06-03 01:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-06-03 01:56 am (UTC)"I wanted to check on you and make sure you were alright," he said. "You know. Eating. Not...not eating."
He shifted uncomfortably. He had no idea why his opinion mattered so much to Fin, but he knew it did and he'd been thinking and thinking of how he'd probably kicked the fae into some destructive spiral like he usually did.
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Date: 2021-06-03 02:19 am (UTC)"I'm fine. I'm eating," Fin replied. And it was true.
"I don't care if you think I'm some whore, John. I know my blood, I know my needs. I'm not going to beat myself up over what I am. I just hope you're kinder to your lover than you are me."
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Date: 2021-06-03 02:40 am (UTC)"Not really, no," he replied. "I know your needs, too, Fin. I never thought you were a whore. But I thought if i said no, you'd accept it and not try to convince me my lover's the whore."
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Date: 2021-06-03 02:44 am (UTC)"I just don't want you to be oblivious. He's pure fae, John. If he's not sleeping around, he's quietly dying," Fin replied bluntly. "I know, because I've tried being with just one person, and... It's just not an option."
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Date: 2021-06-03 02:46 am (UTC)"He says he don't want to," he mumbled.
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Date: 2021-06-03 02:53 am (UTC)Fin shrugged.
"Guess we'll see how that works out for him then."
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Date: 2021-06-03 02:55 am (UTC)"I don't want to fight about this, Fin," he replied.
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Date: 2021-06-03 03:02 am (UTC)"I'm not fighting with you," Fin shrugged. "Me informing you of his needs isn't the throw down you think it is, John. Am I hurt you don't want me? Sure, of course. But I don't want to see your lover die, or you get the wool pulled over your eyes. Believe it or not, this is me giving a shit about you."
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Date: 2021-06-03 03:08 am (UTC)"I'm sure," he said. The thing was, he did believe him. He just didn't want to hear it. He didn't want to think of Fawn in anyone else's bed. He didn't want to think of him dying, either.
"I can't exactly force him to fuck around. So I don't know what to tell you."
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Date: 2021-06-03 03:16 am (UTC)"You could dump him, but we both know you wont. I suppose in a way it's romantic. He's willing to die for you," Fin pointed out, lighting a joint
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Date: 2021-06-03 03:22 am (UTC)"No. I won't dump him. I love him and he makes my shitty fucking life a little better. I fancy being happy for a minute," he said, taking the opportunity to light a cig of his own.
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Date: 2021-06-03 11:35 am (UTC)"Okay. ...So why are you here? Why flowers. What do you want, John?" Fin asked with a sigh. "Because right now it feels like you apologized so you can come back and argue more. I'm not trying to sabotage your relationship, I'm not trying to talk you into bed."
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Date: 2021-06-04 02:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-06-04 01:56 pm (UTC)Fin wet his lips, then looked away.
"Kinda hard though, isn't it? I mean, you're living with my doppelganger, and little more than a month ago you as good as asked me to leave Hex for you. Doesn't feel like a friendship, it feels- Way more complex than that."
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Date: 2021-06-04 02:15 pm (UTC)"I don't know what to suggest, Fin. I can't have you. Not completely. I can't have him. Not completely. We're all going to wind up hurt. Or dead," he said. "So I choose to be happy, however briefly."
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Date: 2021-06-04 02:20 pm (UTC)Fin shrugged, because he didn't have an answer.
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Date: 2021-06-04 02:28 pm (UTC)John waited for Fin to have an idea and when none came, he bowed his head.
"He's going to die," he said quietly. Everyone he loved died. Or went mad, which was worse than death.
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Date: 2021-06-04 09:03 pm (UTC)"I know, but he doesn't have to," Fin said awkwardly.
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Date: 2021-06-04 09:59 pm (UTC)John sighed heavily and his head dropped lower.
"I should go back to Gotham. I'm doing nothing but causing trouble."
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Date: 2021-06-04 10:51 pm (UTC)"That's no good for him either, John," Fin pointed out. "Just saves you the trouble of seeing him fade."
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Date: 2021-06-04 10:52 pm (UTC)"He'll find other people," he said. "...You have other people."
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Date: 2021-06-04 10:54 pm (UTC)"You think that means it doesn't hurt when I know I can't be with you again?" Fin asked.
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