John Constantine (
petty_dabbler) wrote2021-07-19 11:53 am
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Fin
Fawn had given John the pass code so he could come inside without Fawn needing to be there to give permission. And so, naturally, John took advantage of it. He had his feet up, watching a video, when he heard the door.
"I brought some beer, love. And some chocolate. Come see, this is the newest bit of your sho-" he said, slowly turning to look at Fawn.
But it wasn't Fawn.
John sat bolt upright and scrambled to his feet.
"Fin," he said, his throat tight.
"I brought some beer, love. And some chocolate. Come see, this is the newest bit of your sho-" he said, slowly turning to look at Fawn.
But it wasn't Fawn.
John sat bolt upright and scrambled to his feet.
"Fin," he said, his throat tight.
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"That's when you're alive, but you can't wake, correct? I don't believe you're asleep."
Fin wasn't sure what to say for a beat, but gestured for John to follow him as he walked to his bedroom. He was wearing human clothes in an attempt to better fit in, but he was uncomfortable and itching to change into his own garb.
"Tell me about how you came to be here."
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"I went to bed, in my bed, with my boyfriend...that would be your brother. Who wasn't your brother, mind. He was you but from a different dimension. He came through and I think I've done the same thing. I woke up here, in my own clothes and no bloody clue what the fuck was going on," John told him, discreetly facing away to give him privacy.
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"You realize that sounds mad," Fin said, changing into a long green robe and perching himself on the edge of the bed. "I'm not calling you a liar, only that you must know how it sounds. You are the lone believer of this tale, and you want us to conform to your reality? It would make more sense to conform to ours. To hold onto the past only as a memory and build new ones fresh. The Fawn you know isn't my brother in more than one way, meaning this Fawn is not yours at all. Do you not think it cruel to rest the weight of your past on him, rather than creating a new future here? That is, if you truly do hold him in your heart as you say. You may just be transferring emotions onto him. Onto me as well."
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"There's too much coincidence," John said. "We're all tied together somehow. You and Fawn, Hex and Willy Silver and Eliot and Aaron and Remus...God knows who else is on this ship. I don't care if it sounds like bullshit. Where I'm from you're madly in love with the nurse. Fawn's banging Willy in his free time. And that doesn't even touch on the weird mist, or the man in the long coat..."
He sighed heavily.
"I know it sounds mad. I know it does. But there's something here and I'm going to puzzle it out. Why it's always us."
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"Fine, just don't get my brother in trouble, and don't hurt him. ...We can not lose our place here, we have nowhere else to go. If you care for him, for us, you'll keep that information close to your heart while you do whatever it is you're doing," Fin replied.
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"I would give my life for your brother," John said, quite seriously. "He's my best friend."
And Fawn had declared him his and that was all John needed to be happy. To have him in his life.
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"Just know if you harm him, I will harm you worse," he promised. "But fine. Carry on, I guess. ...It's not like I can stop him from doing whatever he wants," he sighed, flopping back onto the bed.
He looked tired. Not sleepy, just... Tired.
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"Are you alright?" he asked, half his brain preoccupied with when he could smoke.
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"No," Fin said, since he had no reason to lie to a man who had no real sway over his fate aboard the ship.
"I thought my work would bring in enough money to remain here, but it's looking more and more like I'll have to take them up on their offer to be an ambassador for my kind."
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"And that's...bad?" John asked gently.
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"I would be asked to cease my work, and discouraged from entangling myself with others on the ship. Especially staff," Fin explained.
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John thought about that for a moment.
"And Hex is staff," he clarified.
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"...Medical," Fin said with a small nod.
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"You'll regret it," John said. "If you're anything like the man I knew. You'll be unhappy with the work, even if you're happy with Hex, and you'll resent him."
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"You mean if I become an ambassador?" Fin asked.
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"Yes," he nodded. "Not a doubt in my head."
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Fin sighed, then shrugged.
"If I don't take it, I can't stay. I can't afford it. Hex suggested marriage, which is sweet, but utter madness. He hardly knows me. Surely they'd expect us to live together... And wouldn't he be bothered when I had to work late?"
He wasn't sure why he was sharing this with John. ...It all just sort of poured out.
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"I cannot imagine any dimension where Hex isn't absolutely mad about you, Fin," John said. "He's the reason I backed off from you. Well, and Fawn. But I knew you'd never leave him for me."
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"I am bound to no soul," Fin said.
Except that was a lie. He was literally bound to Hex in some cosmic way and he knew it.
"You chose my brother over me? May I ask why?"
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"Because. Because...I love him. He takes care of me and I take...took. took care of him," he said, slowly sinking to the corner of the bed as the weight of it finally, finally hit him. All that was behind him. The mornings in bed. The fish and chips. Snogging in the car.
You knew it was coming, John. At least he's probably not dead.
Not helping, Chas, he thought.
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Fin couldn't believe he actually felt bad for him. ...But he did.
Sitting up, he moved so he was beside him.
"If what you say is true- There is a chance he's your... Or, rather, you're his- There isn't a word for it in your language. Soul mate? That is close I guess. ...If he were to use his gift with you, he might feel it. It could unlock something."
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"I'm not asking him for anything he's not ready to give, Fin. It took a while to build trust. I can do it again...unless he decides to be done with me."
It'd be nice to think they were soul mates. That was a nice thought, too sweet for the likes of him, though.
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Fin just hummed, still not sure how he felt about any of this.
"You said there was beer?"
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"Hmm? Oh, yeah. Over there," he said, then rose and walked out to get one, slightly dazed still with his realization.
They were strangers, the twins. John wasn't sure what he was thinking. He couldn't expect to just slot himself into Fawn's life. Just bluster his way in and upturn everything.
"Here you go," he said as he returned with a bottle.
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"Thank you," Fin said with a polite nod, opening it with care and sipping.
"The first time I tried beer I hated it," he confessed. "One of the humans in the colony on my planet gave it to me, and I hated it, but drained the bottle so they wouldn't think I was rude. ...I don't mind it now."
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